replace it with a UV light so I can be the beacon of hope that you've always expected

[two_grey_rooms]

I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO TELL YOU....

I figure being perpetually caught up on my flist + occasionally piping in with posts ruminating on Marc Chagall's contribution to the zombie apocalypse TOTALLY means it's time for the anon memes to start kicking around this journal. Trufax, I have been admiring them from afar all throughout my LJ furlough. I'm not so sure what exactly is the allure of eye-burning html marshaling in comments promising to tell me I've an alternate personality moonlighting as a furry, BUT I'M ROLLING WITH IT, MOTHERFUCKERS.

Other things I love: 1) Jeanette Winterson rendered sketchy by fangirling Alison Bechdel, 2) MY RIDICULOUS FUCKING HETEROSEXIST PURITANICAL ADJECTIVE-ABUSE-INDUCING FORMAL "SEX EDUCATION" FINALLY FUCKING ENDING THIS WEEK, 3) dancing around my living room to Los Campesinos! in very little clothing, and 3) LONG CAT IS LOOOOOOOONG. Oh my god the internet is eating my brain.

Hi, flist! How are you all?

Comments

[lawlzify.livejournal.com]

When I saw the multipinks on your entry, I thought you'd finally gone bonkers.

I was right. ♥

[two-grey-rooms.livejournal.com]

NO, SIR, BONKERS I AM NOT. I'm just a lowly little memesheep. BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA ALSO I AM SMELLY.

[lawlzify.livejournal.com]

i can has shower wiff u?

"NO. I felt like less of a human, and my soul was so sad that even Jesus could not save me from THE PITS OF SEXLESS DESPAAAAAIR. BUT NO DESPAIR CAN END MY ABSTINENCE! I'M DOIN' IT FOR JEEEEESUS!"

ILU. ♥ Can I be a guest in your sex-ed class, there to observe purely for the lulzfest that is certain to commence? Wait, that sounds bad, never mind.

Also I love that YOU got the get-out-of-sex-free card. :D

[two-grey-rooms.livejournal.com]

sheepz dun shower, silly! You can have a sweater knit of my fleece because I love you enough to shave myself nude and clothe you with my detritus ♥ ♥ ♥ (the triple hearts serve to make you believe this is romantic instead of horrifying)

DO YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE IS HORRIFYING IS YOUR PREDILECTION FOR STALKING! lol you're reading my comments to other people FREAK. WHY DON'T YOU JUST GAMBOL THROUGH THE STREETS WITH MY STOLEN PANTIES ON YOUR HEAD? (a har har har, obviously I jest. the internet was MADE for creepifying stalking! I know I do this aaaaall the time).

And you could sit in if I had more than one class left! Sorry, babe, you missed some, uh, LESBIAN RAAAAAAGE requisite exasperation in response to tragic ineptitude OH FOR FUCK'S SAKE IS ELLIE GONNA HAFTA CHOKE A BITCH?! moments...you missed some brilliant stuff, for serious.

My favorite part of the health class, however, HAS GOT TO BE the Drugs Will Make You Infertile And Unable To Subsume Any And All Comfort Food Without Breaking Out In Horrible Horrible Boils And By The Way, Every Time You Smoke A Joint, The Terrorists Blow Up Another Schoolchild unit. Jesus FUCKING Christ, not only was the usual propaganda ridiculous, but they showed us this really gory video of an ER ~*~DRUG DISASTER~*~ and were all THIS COULD BE YOU. HEY, FUCKERS, DIDN'T YOU HEAR FEAR-MONGERING IS SOOOOO LAST SEASON? WE GOT HOPE IN THE WHITE HOUSE NOW, ACT ACCORDINGLY.

...Holy shit, I can RAMBLE. D: